You, or the guy next to you

Disclaimer: This is a post largely aimed at guys. Ladies, that doesn't mean you shouldn't read this. I'm talking to your husbands here, and these are matters that you need to be aware of. I'll probably even write something up aimed at how you can help us guys out. But for now, this one's for the boys...

We all know the stat about Christian marriages and divorce, right? 50% of all marriages -- Christian and non-Christian -- end in divorce. The divorce rate among Christians is now identical to non-Christians. Pretty sad. That means that either you, or the guy sitting next to you, will statistically divorce within your lifetime.

But it gets even worse. A recent study shows that 44% of all married men admit to masturbating weekly, which of course means that they're almost certainly viewing pornographic material at least as often. And remember, folks, these are the people who admit it. Common sense says there's another 10 or 20 percent out there who (rightly) are ashamed of their behavior, and won't admit it.

So there it is. Statistically speaking, then, either you're sitting in the dark staring at your computer, with only one hand on the keyboard... or the guy next to you is.

Pretty sad, isn't it?

So what do we do with this? Chalk it up to our culture? Blame it on mainstream media, or the proliferation of shows like "Desperate Housewives" and "Six Feet Under?"

How about this? How about we blame this problem on (1) ourselves, for being depraved, sinful creatures, who have fallen just as our first father, Adam, has fallen, and (2) our churches, who have denied the truth of Scripture by omission; by not speaking out on sexual sin, on immorality and perversion, within the context of Scripture?

Yes, that feels about like where the blame should lie, doesn't it?

Isaiah 64:6 tells us our righteousness, apart from Jesus Christ, is "filthy rags." Commentators, including my pastor, Dr. Robert Jeffress, will tell you the word used by Isaiah refers to discarded menstrual rags. So let me make this clear: the very best we can do, apart from Jesus Christ, is a bloody tampon in God's sight. That's Scripture, not some hyperbole or exaggeration, folks.

So is it any surprise, really, that we're prone to wickedness? Is it really a shock what we, the Christian leaders of our home (in name, if not in deed) will do when left to our own devices?

But there's another factor, one I'm equally passionate about. Our churches have long spoken out against sin, but left us, the young married couples of the 21st century, to wonder, "What exactly does that mean?" Think about just a few of the phrases you've probably heard in Sunday School and worship lately:

• Put on "the mind of Christ"
• Follow "the Lord's leading"
• Be sure you have "perfect peace"

What the heck do any of these mean? Come Monday morning, when I find myself on IM with that attractive marketing director, what should I do? Run screaming? Log off of IM? Tell my wife about my inner thoughts? What is "the mind of Christ" in these matters, because I definitely don't have "perfect peace."

This is where a class like Sparks Fly comes into the picture. The entire purpose of this class is not to add to Scripture; to be "relevant" or "contemporary"; or even to "meet you where you are" or "take culture on." We're here to speak plainly, as the Bible speaks plainly. We're here to take Scripture and teach it, clearly, in the most vile culture.

See, here's the thing: the Bible speaks on sexuality, in amazingly graphic terms (the Song of Solomon talks specifically about various forms of sex, including oral sex, and even has the bride performing a strip tease for her husband!). The Bible deals with adultery over and over, both the deed (David, as a prime example) and restoration (the book of Hosea). The Bible tells us how to handle debt (throughout Proverbs) and is filled with complicated family issues, from incestuous relationships and offspring (Lot and his daughters) and nasty in-laws (Jacob and Laban). The problem is not our culture or the emerging church; it's that we've forgotten that the Bible speaks plainly on the issues of our day.

So you... or the guy next to you... is caught up in sexual sin. First, right now, repent of that sin! Ask Jesus for forgiveness; he'll give it to you. I John 1:9 says if we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. And second, stop piddling around with Christianity. Get serious about the Word of God.

And please, come join us for Sparks Fly, beginning February 8. By the grace and power of Jesus, we're going to tackle these issues head-on, in plain language. The Bible speaks... won't you come listen with us?